Potty Training and other pointless attempts at parenting

Our daughter peed in my shoes today. Luckily she peed on a pair of her shoes as well but it didn't soften the blow. She had ragged one of her potty chairs (yes, she has more than one) over to a corner to hide and attempt to pee on the potty and overshot her ass over the edge and peed onto my shoes two feet away. Soaking a braided wool rug, my new walking shoes, and her aqua socks included. At least hers were water proof.

We've tried prizes, singing, books, cute underwear, alarm reminders, games, naked time, training pants, pull-ups and allowing her to have a potty out in the living room. Nothing has worked. I've officially given up for today. She's in a diaper, she's watching Super Why, and I'm silently hoping that the day miraculously passes by so I can return to bed.

If this morning was a sign of the day I can only hope for it to pass quickly. We had a feeling that there was something amiss when we woke up to silence at 6am (late for her). I was walking up behind Jamie as he turned on the lamp in her room and heard him say, "Wow, sure does smell like poop in - aaaah!"

You had decided to clean up the problem yourself using your pillows, blankets, and sheets. There was poop caked on to your crack still but you had most of it off of you, well done.